Hey Dan – I just started following you on Twitter. Something caught my attention. Being a guy with a rough childhood and father/family wounds, etc., I have made more than a few mistakes on my path. I love the boldness and way you provide meaningful help to others. Just wanted to say THANK YOU! Keep it up! Preston
Hi Preston! Thanks for leaving me a message on here! I appreciate it! So hello from Fort Worth! Father/family wounds – yes, unfortunately all too common! I do appreciate that you honor my boldness and providing help to others! You’re quite welcome! I’m glad I can share things that turn the rough childhood into something positive! Dan
Being a person who was committed by a doctor, I can only say that it is a totally humilating experience to be taken to the hospital in a police car in handcuffs. I can only imagine what images came to you as a child; when these hurtful, life damaging words were said to you. It is amazing that you endured your life at all. You have risen above all that could ever be expected of you and more. Keep sharing your words and story as it gives others, like me, hope and inspiration.
Wow, Janice! You really lived the reality of the nightmare I was exposed to! This was a time when having a vivid imagination didn’t help me! I didn’t really understand what the word asylum meant, but just the way she described it made it sound really really bad!
Thank you so much for honoring how I have risen above! I feel fortunate to have had so much support along the way, and people who believed what happened to me, and believed in me! I will be sharing more of this story weekly, and then publish the book of the whole thing this summer! Thank you so much for your continuing support of me!
I’ve come to know you through your “Minute to Minute” radio comments on either Green 960 Am or KPFA 94.1 FM. Not sure where I hear you, but those are the only two radio stations I listen to. I live in the San Francisco Bay Area.
These relate to my growing up in an alcoholic home. For me, the eldest, I’m sure I’ve taken on many of the attributes of one who meets that criteria, but the drinking in my home didn’t start until I was in middle school, plus overall other than the unfortunate drinking, I had a wonderful childhood.
I’d like to have the opportunity of either talking more with you about this, or knowing of a place in the Berkeley, Oakland area where I could talk to others who have come from similar environments.
I never began drinking myself, nor do I smoke. Growing up first born I wanted to be in control of my life. I don’t need to be in control of others, except that I chose to become a teacher of elementary school children. This career path has been good for me, teaching me to complete things, but also it’s been difficult too because I don’t have an authoritarian personality.
Thanks so much for contacting me! It’s always great to hear from people who tell me they benefit from listening to Minute To Freedom! It must be Green 960, they’re on there and one other station in San Francisco. Sounds like you certainly relate to the characteristics I describe in my minutes. I had the same experience – at some times my childhood was very positive and exciting. When the drinking accelerated, things went downhill and it was another experience entirely.
I’d be glad to share with you more about all of this – at times it can be a bit overwhelming to absorb. You can email me at firstname.lastname@example.org, and I’d be glad to talk more with you.
The other thing you can try is to find some meetings of Adult Children of Alcoholics. Much of what I describe in my minutes is from that program. Here’s what I’d suggest. Go to http://www.adultchildren.org/ and click on the meetings tab. You enter your location, and it will show you meetings in your area. Just out of curiosity, I entered Berkeley, and there are quite a number of meetings in your area. I’m envious – the resources have dried up here in Fort Worth. Meetings are kind of like picking a church – some fit, some do not. It’s encouraged that if you visit, try a couple of different meetings, or at least go several times – so you don’t rate the program based on one meeting, which might give you an incomplete perspective if it’s an off night. I’d be glad to share with you more of my experience with that program.
Great that you don’t drink – many who grew up with an alcoholic continue the cycle that way. I’m a first born as well, and we have an interesting blend of tendencies because of it – hero child, rescuer, those sort of things. I can imagine if you don’t have an authoritarian personality, trying to herd elementary school children could be a tough task.
Oh – and on my blog, you can click on the Minute to Freedom logo and go to a site where I have all the segments together. Sometimes people like to browse that way instead of what might come up on the radio. And right below it is a tab for iTunes. I’m having the episodes listed there.
I’m certainly glad to connect with you here. I’d be glad to talk with you more about all of this. Stay in touch and we’ll talk more!
There’s not an ironclad method, but Mark, what I have always done is include a line at the top of my manuscript! “Copyright 2012 Dan L. Hays.” I’ve seen various opinions about the effectiveness of that. Some would say you own the copyright just by writing it – but as a businessman, I feel better putting it out there by putting the statement on the top of my manuscript.
Not a stupid question, Mark! I’ve seen it discussed at length in workshops at writer’s conferences!